First Time in My Life

This was the first time in my life, start working at a new place with such a bad mood. This morning try to give myself some reason to not to go to work so early, ya I try to run away from work, but I know I can’t.

Why on the way no traffic jam, why no other reason to let me not working this day, why… why… driving friend’s car but inside me keep on asking something that never will happen. No matter how, I still need to facing it, I know I hate it, but I still have to…

They noticed that I’m not happy, I mean the staff there, I did a lot of day dream, no reason, just unhappy…

Run away from office around 7pm, with the reason need to look for room nearby. Drive to 7/11, get two no, called. Bukit Tinggi Apartment, not available liao… call the one nearby 7/11, a Chinese guy answer, I thought that house will be a Chinese’s house, but not, it is a ‘international rent house’, inside got 5 rooms, in a lot, share the house with some people don’t-know-who.

No choice, just call to Area Manager and get approval, wish that the landlord can hold that room till Monday, until I get the approval. If not then I need to look for other places… Tired, very down, very the bad mood.

Drive another 31km, I count it, back to KL hostel, still bad mood, take my gym bag and go to gym room. Try to concentrate on workout, but can’t. Walk away after one and a half hour inside.

Try to talk to someone about my feeling now, but cannot, don’t wish to make people worry, especially listen to my voice now. Catch some sleep, try to relax in my dream, no need to think too much…